Once children get to middle school, life starts to take a different dimension. Friendships change; cries grow louder; and unfortunately, cruelty can be even less obvious, at times it can be behind the phones, whispers, or chats in groups. It is not like teaching a 7-year-old how to share toys or to apologize. The students of middle school are affected by peer pressure, social media and the fear of being singled out. Talking to them about bullying or unkindness must be deeper, to the very core of what they are becoming, and what God made them to be.
As parents, teachers, and youth leaders, we usually feel confused over the appropriate words to be used. Middle schoolers are expanding emotionally, spiritually and socially and they are fast to pick up on lectures or a simple solution.
At this age they can get to know that cruelty is frequently caused by insecurity, jealousy, loneliness or pain. It is best explained in tender terms so that they can understand that unsympathetic words are not realities about them. The popularity of middle schoolers and their looks, or internet acceptance, are some of the things that help them gauge their value, thus reminding them of their identity given by God is highly significant. When they realize that God loves them, they are lesser likely to believe what other people are saying.
Misery at this point can not necessarily be blatant. It might manifest itself in the form of exclusion, sarcasm, screenshots, rumors, or silence in groups. A name will help the middle schoolers to know when something is wrong and they will be allowed to express it. They must also be counseled about boundaries. Instead of attacking back, being vengeful and ruthless, they may learn to speak calmly and firmly or walk away. There is nothing weaker than blocking or walking out of a situation, it is being wise and having self-respect.
Attention and popularity are frequently praised in terms of middle school culture, and kindness is perceived as a danger. It is in this that faith comes as an anchor. Prayer should be encouraged so that students can stop being liked and instead become rooted. A prayer to God to give them courage and to give them clarity can calm their hearts. The fact that Jesus Himself was rejected, misunderstood, and mocked also makes them realize that faith does not make them accepted but does give them strength and direction.
Online environments now constitute a huge portion of the life in middle school. Words typed on screens could be as painful as the oral words. There is a need to have an open conversation about online behavior. Help students stop before they post, not to share harmful information, and report to the administrator when they witness a victim. Early harm can be prevented with the help of screenshots and trusted adults. Technology will help to remind other people that kindness can go much farther than a classroom.
This group of age is mostly confused with forgiveness. And it should not be an invitation to turn a blind eye to hurt or to remain silent about damage. Forgiveness refers to not letting anger to have dominion over the heart. Open discussions on healing assist middle schoolers in the realization that boundaries and forgiveness can coexist with each other. Healing and wisdom praying enables God to heal both the dwelling heart and the suffering heart.
The children in middle schools can also lead. They do not necessarily feel that they are powerful but their decisions count. Spending time with an isolated person, not laughing at cruelty or quiet support may alter the mood of a whole group. Once kind behavior is demonstrated, other people are allowed to do so. Bravery is usually developed in small ways that are not noticed.
Stanley finds out in God the Gardener that kindness is not feeble, it is strength. He experiences unkindness in his life and accordingly realizes that love, which is based on faith, is enough to change hearts. Middle schoolers have been seeking identity, belonging and meaning. When such needs are grounded on the love of God, they will be more equipped to confront peer pressure, bullying, and transition.
They should be taught to react courageously, compassionately, and with faith so that they can become strong, sensitive and loving people. These teachings are not forgotten after the middle school. They get used as a basis of their treatment of other people, views of self and perceptions of the world.
We cannot take away all the sufferings, yet we can be able to provide advice, companionship and hope. This is when cruelty comes, then it is the time to make them turn back to the stable love of God. It is a slow process of sowing seeds of courage and compassion, with the help of patience, honest talk and prayer, that will only start growing even in those times when our life is uncertain. With such care those seeds, hearts are made, gracious, strong, empathetic. This way, God is still going to have his garden bloom, a young life at time, that will yield its fruit long after these youthful years, to the generations who, through faith will lead in the right direction.
There is no child at any stage of their life who does not at one time come across someone who is mean. This can be a peer that teases them, a friend that leaves them behind or even a bully that speaks or does mean things or actions. To the parents, grandparents and the teachers, it is very painful to watch a child feel small, frightened, or confused. We usually want to shield them against any form of injury but all the unpleasant situations may not be evaded. However, these experiences can be influential to educate the children on the subject of love, bravery, pardon, and how God invites us to perceive others.
Unkindness occurs when an individual decides to harm another individual either intentionally by words or actions. It may appear as laughing when one commits a mistake, leaves a person out of a game, names, or destruction of properties that do not belong to them. Children learn about such kinds of behavior very fast since they experience the sting immediately. What they do not know is why one would want to behave in such a manner. By assisting them to label mean action they provide them with words about their situation and remind them that what they went through was not permissible.
Uncivil treatment frequently develops out of misery. The child that hits another can be in need of attention, fearful, or depressed without knowing how to express it. This is not justification of their acts but it makes children understand that cruelty is normally a sign of something that is broken within the other individual. Adults forget this at times. The bullies can be unloved, insecure, or desperate to feel strong since they are small inside. When children are taught to view things this way, it will help them feel anger but empathy and will also make them remember that all hearts must be loved by God.
In cases where a child is abused by cruelty, the child may be ashamed or even scared to voice out. They should be reminded that reporting to an adult they can trust is not equivalent to tattling but an act of bravery and safety. Silence enables abusive conduct to develop. Learning peaceful methods of reacting like walking away or short simple words which do not contribute to the situation are also beneficial to children. Drilling such responses at home makes them feel ready rather than helpless.
Prayer is another strong asset of strength. Once children are educated to take their fears and pain to God, they learn that they are never alone. Saying a few words of peace and courage and protection will sooth their hearts. It also reminds them that a presence of God accompanies them everywhere they go, in a classroom or in a bus or alone in the playground.
We are called on by God to love others but by loving others, it does not mean that we should have ourselves hurt. Children should learn that kindness and boundaries could coexist. Forgiveness is not necessarily an act of keeping an acquaintance or keeping close to the person who offends one. It is a matter of losing bitterness to the extent that it does not settle its roots on their hearts. This is a significant difference that is liberating to children.
Listening is more important than fixing when a child opens up to reveal that he/ she is hurt. The assurance, validation and a calm reaction make them feel safe. The importance of reminding them that God loves them as they keep reminding them of their value. It may also assist in explaining in a gentle way that some individuals are yet to discover how to love well. Not all the seeds of God’s garden bloom according to time, and some require far more attention than the rest.
In God the Gardener, the young Stanley experiences the unkindness and gets to know that fear is natural, but love is stronger. In his quest, children learn how being good and peaceful does not make one a weak person. It strengthens the heart. Promotion of small acts of kindness among children, which can be sitting with the lone one, giving compliments or saying prayers to those who have hurt us are ways of changing pain into growth.
When one prays on behalf of an unkind person, he is not forgiving them but rather he heals himself. It changes the heart with darkness to light. This is the way love slays cruelty bit by bit, with little seeds. Every humane decision shuns a seed of goodness in a children heart.
Any experience of cruelty is the opportunity to educate about faith, bravery and kindness. Although we cannot guard children against all miseries, we can make them look through the eyes of God. Children start to develop into powerful tender hearts when they get to know that even bullies are bruised seeds who want love. These are those hearts which cause the garden of God to bloom, disseminating good beyond itself when the hurt was first done.
The seed sometimes that is the smallest sprouts into the greatest blessings. That mere fact stands at the core of God the Gardener a novel that had been written in a low-key manner, in a caring, non-ambitious way, and with no other purpose than to be read and appreciated. As with most important concepts, it was conceived as a result of a real-life experience and the need of a parent to mentor a child in a loving and religious way.
I had one young child who was having problems with a bully in school when they were young. It is so difficult to see a child hurt as a parent. I recall that we sat down to have a soft, emotional chat on how kind, empathetic, and responsive we can become when others decide to be unkind. I did not want my child to be angry or fearful but to realize the strength of love and grace. That discussion was the seed that led to the creation of what was to be God the Gardener.
I was compelled to write a story that would convey those values in a manner that a child is able to comprehend. The concept of the planting of the seeds in the Garden of God was a natural one. In the story, all the seeds are the options, kindness, patience, forgiveness, and love. I wrote it in a simple, loving and caring manner, hoping that it would touch their hearts and make them vision the world in terms of the love of God.
I read the story to my children a couple of times and they became immediately associated with the story. They posed questions, expressed their ideas and even saw themselves in the garden. That was sufficient to me at the time. Life, which is usually so, was hectic. The narrative was saved on my computer and cleverly stored in a tiny folder and I went back to the stunning disorder of bringing up a family. This was in 1980, a fact that I wrote under the title, and never had a dream of the significance of that date in the future.
Seasons came and went, years went by. My children matured, had their own lives and they even went ahead to give me grandchildren. It happened on one of my ordinary days as I worked on another project altogether and I searched my computer on a file. That is how I bumped into it again, God the Gardener. Looking at the title was like a slight shoulder-tap by God Himself. I also think it was not a mere coincidence, but it was a God thing.
When I read the story the second time, I felt something in my heart. The message was equally or more so to this day as applicable. I started to pose myself a very serious question: could it be a Christian children picture book? The solution would not lie in logic, but in some silent feeling of tranquility and direction.
The story acquired a completely new life when I started to make the illustrations. And every picture sprang to color, joy, and warmth. The garden grew bigger than these words because it was a pictorial manifestation of the love of God. I was connected to the story more with each illustration and actually felt that I was raising something alive and valuable.
Friends and family members were extremely supportive, when they viewed the project. They taught me that kindness is what this world needs badly, and children who are learning to cope with their feelings and relationships should have it. They were excited and this proved to me that this story had to be told.
God the Gardener is not just a book that is meant for children. It is a tender message that all hearts will open when they are tended with love, faith and compassion. It also makes children know how simple acts of kindness can be nurtured to become something beautiful when they are planted under the watch of God.
Nowadays God the Gardener is a monument of patience, faithfulness and the timing of God. The message has been given by a seed planted in 1980 and I am honored to be able to share the message with families all over. Nevertheless, it sometimes takes time, trust and a little watering to watch the most significant stories in our world actually grow just as God had planned.
The message of God the Gardener is especially significant in the modern world which is as fast paced and is sometimes challenging. Children are constantly receiving some sort of lesson in the world around them and stories like this one can also serve to program those lessons in love and not in fear. The book inspires meaningful communication between parents, children, teachers, and caregivers with the help of tender storytelling and reassuring images.
It challenges the families to be more deliberate, meditate, and discuss the ways in which making everyday decisions can build hearts and communities. Being read at bedtime, at school, during time of personal reflections, God the Gardener is a source of spiritual development and emotional realization. It also makes children know that they are not alone in their predicament and that the love of God is ever present and patient to help them grow.
In going back to this story so many years later, I was struck by the fact that the timing of God is always at the right time, and that the seed that is neglected now could always grow when it is cultivated with faith and intent. This is the same path that the readers carry on telling the story, seeding kindness and observing faith-building gardens blooming next to love.
I was unable to think about other things after having rediscovered in my computer God The Gardener, a story I wrote in 1980. Rediscovering it was almost dreamy, as though some segment of my past had waited patiently to slumber up at the appropriate time. The more I was reading the words the better I could see how perfectly the message of the piece matched the world we are currently living in.
Our sincerity appears to be something that we all need at the moment. In a world where people are overwhelmed with noise, confusion, and segregation, kind words of love and compassion are more than welcome. And such an uncomplicated, yet strong, fact was inscribed in this story written so many years ago: the seeds of love, joy, and faith do not actually die. They can sleep a certain period and then be waiting the moment a season comes they grow.
Since I was reading the story again, I started to envision what it might be, other than a document on a screen. I began to wonder whether God the Gardener might be turned into a children picture book, something that could be touched and talked about and returned to over and over again by the families. I found the idea to be stimulating and somehow terrifying. This was my first book publication and the process was life threatening and strange.
Nonetheless, I continued to revisit one mission, my vision of the way I wanted children to perceive the moment they would see the book. I wanted them to feel safe. I desired them to experience warmth, peace and hope. I wanted each page to encourage them in a gentle manner that the love of God is always there and that the decisions that they make such as planting seeds can make the world a better place.
It is in this light that I started drawing the pictures. I envisioned rich color and low light, fruit-laden trees, light streaming through leaves, and children being taught to be kind in little but significant ways. Every drawing had to be more than just pretty; it had to represent the soul of the story. I outlined the content, mood and feeling of each scene with great care so that the images would facilitate the message and not overshadow it.
God the Gardener began to feel that the pictures were really coming to life as the pictures began falling into place. It was as though I could see something holy growing in my presence. The garden is no longer a mere notion, but it is a living breathing world into which children can enter. My confidence increased with every illustration, although I kept on learning new things in the process.
I plunged into the world of details that I have never paid so much attention to: trim sizes, picture-book designs, fonts, spacing, and colors. I got to know how drawings can make a child follow his or her eye through a page and how the slightest of design can influence the experience of telling a story. Every decision mattered. The delicacies of the backgrounds and the straightforwardness of the text were all instrumental in establishing the light-hearted mood the story was required to have.
At all times, friends and family were crucial during this process. Whenever they beheld what it is I was doing their reply was spontaneous and emotional. They replied to me that the world needed this just now. The words made me have the strength to continue as I self-doubted. I believe that their faith in the story also made me make a leap of faith that I would not have made myself.
It was not merely a project to get out of publishing God the Gardener; it was a trust. Hope that the message would get to the hearts. Have faith that God had the right time, as ever. What was originally a short story that was composed in order to console one child on a painful occasion had become a lot more than that.
The God the Gardener is today a mission as opposed to a simple book. It is one way of letting children all over the world realize that the love of God is a seed planted in each of us, just like that seed planted in a garden. It teaches young readers the fact that kindness is a plant that we have to plant every day with our words and deeds, and even the tiniest gestures of love can bloom and turn into something beautiful. Seeing this story unfold into a children picture book has actually been one of the greatest experiences in my life and I am happy that I am finally able to share it with the world.
Have you not seen a child plant a small seed, and then go and see it day after day, waiting so long till the first little sprout should come poking up through the earth? Their eyes are full of interest and they wonder and wonder as they water the ground, they speak to the seed and think of what that will be. It is that wonderment that we have when we assist our children in planting the seeds of kindness. We might not get any immediate outcome, however, something beautiful will start to grow in their hearts, and at some time, it will bloom in a way we could never anticipate.
Children are not taught but experience. When goodwill is handled like a seed, something that lives that requires nurturing, then they can come to the realization that their activities matter. As a garden needs time to grow, kindness is built up with time, it is influenced by love, patience and the same. Every little lesson is a way of feeding children and making them become loving and caring people.
Goodness does not do good by being great or intricate. Indeed, the most significant results are sometimes made by the tiniest move. Kind acts may start with something as simple as giving out crayons to a school mate, smiling at the new child at the playground or giving thanks without being prompted. These are the moments, which might appear insignificant, yet they are striking. Once children get to know that even small gestures can make a difference, they start to realize that love starts to grow at first in their hearts and then in the world surrounding them.
Every good deed is a seed in the garden of God, and it is slowly cultivated under the ground. These seeds over time determine the perceptions of children about others and their reaction to challenges, conflict and difference. When children are taught that kindness is a choice, they get to see that they have a choice always. They may decide to plant love rather than anger, patience rather than frustration and compassion rather than fear.
My book, God the Gardener, informs little Stanley that God also plants good seeds in all of us. Kindness, joy and gentleness as well as love are represented by these seeds. However, they require care just as real plants do. They cannot grow without water, sunlight and attention. It is our responsibility to create a garden in the hearts of our children by modeling patience, encouraging and not judging but loving them unconditionally.
Benevolence develops most effectively when applied on a daily basis particularly at home. Rituals of kindness could be established by families to make kindness visible and meaningful. One of the ways of doing this is by making a Kindness Jar. Whenever any of your family members does something nice, put it on a small paper or a heart on the papers and put it in the jar. Read them out at the end of the week and rejoice the love that was experienced.
The other concept is the Garden of Gratitude. To make children feel that there is something to be thankful about, it is best to draw flowers on piece of paper and write something that you are thankful on each petal and make a circle of it. Bedtime Blessings may, too, be an easy routine. One can also ask your child who they were kind to that day before going to bed and praying to that person to think about how they treated others and connect with God.
In these minute, daily incidents the garden of their hearts opens itself. Being nice transforms lives, not only to the recipients of the kindness, but also to those who are kind. We are transforming a generation that will spread the light of God and goodness everywhere, when we teach children to plant the seeds of love, joy and kindness. In a society that seems fast-paced and rough, a world where bringing up good kids is a great act of faith. As you go on, in the course of your day, stop and challenge yourself and now is the time to ask yourself: what am I going to plant, what kindness seed can I plant in this very moment? As we mature, the garden of God prospers, one loving seed at a time.
Did you ever see how children put the most wonderful questions at the most unusual times? Perhaps, it occurs in the car queue on the way to school, when they brush their teeth, or when both are staring at the sunset after a tiring day. The little innocent things are the things that seem so normal but are sacred soil. They are sweet beginnings in which hearts are tender and inquisitiveness is vivid, and form all such beautiful opportunities of conversing about the love of God, which can best be conceived and retained by children.
We do not necessarily have to have a sermon, a classroom scenario, and a well-laid lesson to talk about faith. There are moments when the strongest discussions about God go on in the midst of daily life. There is nothing like an honest line of conversation said earnestly, to impress itself better than an elaborate explanation. When children witness faith being incorporated in ordinary life, they start to realize that the love of God is not confined to the walls of the church but it is everywhere they turn.
Children are taught about God not just in words, but wonder. When you see that a flower is in blossom, or a bird making a nest, or a rainbow, you have seen it after a storm, stop and ask them to see it with you. Just by uttering such a statement as God made this so beautiful, helps them tie the things that they perceive to the Creator that loves them. With time, children begin to sense the presence of God in the world surrounding them and faith becomes alive and dynamic rather than distant and abstract.
Another success method of making children comprehend love, forgiveness, and grace is by telling stories. Giving them some stories out of your own life, of how you were comforted, forgiven, or of how God helped you, makes them see that faith is a reality and it is personal. The usual examples are just as effective. When a child reaches out to assist a friend, to be patient, even to make a decision of kindness, raising a finger in order to notice it will make him realize that these things are how God loves him. Kids are most engaged in the experiences they live in and in some way, these little tales silently make their perceptions of the heart of God.
Anxieties and fears also provide significant time to discuss faith. Children are also prone to feeling apprehensive about school, friends, or even things that are not really understood. You can even make use of those feelings to experience moments of prayer instead of rejecting them. Teaching a child to open up to God about his/her concerns helps him/her know that praying is not hard and frightening. A little prayer can make them feel their presence, their support, and their remembrance that God is with them in all of their fears.
Our actions are louder than what we are saying. Children will always observe the way adults react to frustration, errors, and difficulties. Once they observe patience, forgiveness, and humility on action, they will start to realize what the love of God looks like in real-life situation. Knowing how to make an apology and seek forgiveness teaches the element of honesty and graciousness. These are the times when children realize that love does not imply being perfect, but being ready to develop and mend.
Maintaining dialogue about God to be natural and happy is a way of making children feel secure and free. Religion does not have to be heavy and coerced. It can be moved without issues when it comes to baking, walking the dog, having a meal or even tucking them into bed at night. The process of making faith a part and parcel of life also means that children grow up knowing faith to be something loving, happy and very much integrated to their identity.
In God the Gardener, Stanley comes to know that love is a seed that God planted within each heart. Such seed thrives as it is tended to daily by words, deeds and treatment. The sunlight and water are given by the parents, caregivers and loved ones through the simple talks, soft directions and affectionate examples. Those little instances of connection eventually help the faith to establish roots as the kids grow.
We do not just talk about God; we live and share his love. The new opportunities are presented every day to demonstrate that children can find the love in helping hands, kind words, forgiveness, and gratitude. Whenever your child poses a big question or makes some silent thought, you should stop and listen the next time. It is in those ordinary things that faith grows, and where the love of God tenderly forms in their hearts.
These instances might not appear much in the moment but they silently give a base of trust and faith that helps children in life. Faith should be presented with compassion and habituality which will make it not a pressure but a comfort. Children are taught that the love of God is constant, persevering and constant, and that he is always close even on hard days.
When we talk about God in our ordinary situations, we provide the children with a lingo of hope which they can back to repeatedly. The sensation of being loved, guided, and supported by God stays even after certain conversations are forgotten, and, as such, it keeps growing. It is a gentle process of faith that is nurtured through this silent practice that enables children to take the love of God into their decisions, relationships and futures with certainty and complete happiness.
